Strength is a weakness - maybe, worse than any other. For, when the strong feel weak, they find they have little to fall back on. There is no space to rest; as no one can actually grasp just how strong their need for support is. Some like to believe that no storm can weaken the strong; some are unable to come to terms with the weakness of the previously strong; and others just ignore the weakness of the strong.
And so, the strong must weather the storm alone. They stay isolated. With luck, no one will demand their time and strength during the moments of weakness.
Most of the time, it is taken for granted that the strong "will cope, will get on". Even if they can't. No-one wants to see the strong as fallible. And so the pretend game for the day is - They will not just survive, but do just fine!
And in the process, those dubbed strong lose out on a lot of the support they really need. Some go under. Those that do survive, are accompanied forevermore by a shadow of that lonely pain they experienced. It makes them wistful, it makes them vulnerable to feeling lonely. It even makes them a little angry about the world around them.
Even when they take that deep breath and move on, they may not feel whole. Especially when they extend support to others... and for a moment, the loneliness of old flashes past them as they attempt to erase it from the eyes of another.
So you see, even strength is sometimes a weakness.
7 comments:
What about denial of the strong to accept that they are facing a moment of weakness?
Don't the strong in the heart know a crisis moment but chose to ignore it, thereby burying it. These buried form layers in mind, which just pour out in an extremely unguarded moment. But strong as they believe they are, its covered up immediately.
the strong need not fear weakness if they are really strong.
i read somewhere that real strength lies not in not falling, but rising back very time you fall. kinda believe in that.
like a minister who's lost power. like a sportsperson who's left out of the squad. like expectations built too high to be fulfiled after a disapointment.
but it's only a show of strength if it fears failure. power and control can come and go. not strength. i think.
the one thing i can think of right now if the scene from Spiderman 2, when Spidey stops the train and loses his strength in doing so. you know how he is helped...
@ vish: yes i agree with you. but my point was never about power.. or succes, or failure. it was about feelings. and the strong, at all times are humans too - who feel lonely, who feel pain.
if someone is strong that get past a failure, oh yes... but it doesn't mean they aren't scared.
@ anon: i never said the strong don't try to hide weak moments. oh yes they do! but that is no reason to let them cope on their own.
and yes, isn't part of the reason they pretend to be ok that they are expected to be so? for the people around?
n oh yeh, do leave ur name n a link next time :)
Exactly my point. That the strong believe and behave that they are strong as they are expected to do so. If they did any other way round, it would not be them. Or so they think.
I dont have a link, and i would rather stay anon
well, ain't it up to us to help them think differently then? most of the time i've found, we just need to give them the space to weaken safely... even when they don't ask for it. just like they do for us. they mayn't take it; but it helps them all the same.
not everyone can ask for help easily.. sometimes it just needs to be given. it's like b'day presents. simply b'cos it has the same effect... of making the person feel cared for.
well i think that its upto the strong to actually realise how strong they actually are...and if they do know it then they definitely shall be able to rise when they fall.
...so it is more about realisation rather than strength.
@ navneet: yes, i agree. my point though, was never aboout rising or not. it was about the emotional experience of a person who is strong, and then again, human.. so not infailable.
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